Grief Counselling

What is Grief?

When we mention the topic 'grief' most of us will probably think about deep sadness in response to the death of an individual, but it is important to note that we also grieve the loss of a job, a relationship, our home, finances etc. 

It is also worth noting that grieving is not a straight line. Most of us who have experienced a sense of loss will recall that it can feel confusing, messy and overwhelming.  Yesterday we may have felt fine, but today we heard a random song on the radio which pulled us back down into a state of weeping that feels endless. Tomorrow we may feel fine again until suddenly we recall a happy memory concerning us and the deceased which can make us break down again. 

A counselling session in progress, featuring thoughtful exchange and note-taking, highlighting both in-person and online support available in English.

What is Grief therapy?

Grief therapy is a talking therapy that helps people process intense emotional pain or more complex reactions after a major loss. It can be conducted face to face or on-line. 

My grief therapy work 

My job isn't to take away the intense pain of loss away from my clients, nor is my role to force them to move on. Instead, I encourage them to be in the present moment, and whatever arises in the therapy space is allowed to surface, i.e. thoughts, feelings, and behaviours, without judgement from them and myself. This encourages my clients to view themselves as a whole, rather than just a series of thoughts and feelings etc. And what then emerges, usually after a few sessions, is the wisdom, strength, self belief and resilience to step forward into a brighter future. Clients discover for themselves how to live fully and authentically, even when facing pain and loss. 

So ultimately my responsibilities are to: 

- encourage clients to feel their emotions without fear of being judged or rushed

- create a space whereby they can honour the relationship or the thing they have lost, explore 'unfinished business' with the deceased, and help them to integrate aspects of that relationship, into the person they are now becoming. 

- help them to reconnect with parts of themselves that have been numbed by grief

- lead them into a journey of new meaning in their life after loss, this might include building coping strategies and self care skills. 

Grief therapy and the loss of a family pet

Losing a beloved dog or cat etc can be extremely painful due to the intense love and bond we have shared with them and often over many years. Owners may feel ashamed, foolish and guilty for feeling such deep sadness for 'just an animal'. In these incidences I encourage my clients to acknowledge the depth of feeling they have had for their pet and to give themselves permission to grieve for this creature who brought companionship, fun and joy to their lives. Whether we are dealing with the loss of a pet or a person, the therapeutic processes are very similar. 

Comfort during difficult times

Community Support for the loss of a pet

Society as a whole often minimizes pet loss which can leave owners feeling like they must hide their pain.  Also. people often rally around when a human dies but they might not understand pet loss. 

As a remedy for some of the issues experienced by bereaved pet owners, a dear friend of Natural Joki Flow has set up her own community website, FourFeetInHeaven, https://fourfeetinheaven.com/ with an aim to create a cathartic space for pet owners whose beloved dog or cat etc, have passed over. For example, through shared stories, memorial pages, supportive guidance and small acts of remembrance, the site hopes to remind grieving owners that their bond mattered, their sorrow is real, and they deserve a place where their feelings can be held with kindness and respect.